Anyone who knows me knows I’m probably one of the happiest people you will ever come across. My face is in constant smile mode. I’m pretty optimistic and even when ‘shit hits the fan’, I always try to see the bright side of every situation. As a twin, my sister was always the evil one. We used to joke that I took all of her happiness from her, because I’m ridiculously smiley and happy all of the time. She had mastered the death stare at the age of two.
Everyone has their dark days as have I, but it has never changed my personality as this happy go-lucky person. It’s very hard to anger me or upset me. Even when I am angry with someone I’m always smiling, so people are never quite sure how to read me. The same can be said for when I’m upset, however, I can confidently say that I’ve cried more from laughing too hard than being overcome with sadness.
To complement my 100% happy vibe, I’m equally as chilled out. It takes a lot for me to dislike someone and I always give people second, third, ten chances if they are remotely dickish. I know this can be seen as a disadvantage as it makes me easy to be walked all over and used. Which has happened on small-scale situations growing up, but I don’t care about the past. Living in the now and looking forward to the future is more important.
Recently, I have lost one of my close friends from high school. This is the first time I’ve ever had to deal with someone close to me passing away. It was more the shock and the thought of never seeing her again that hit me the hardest. You don’t know what you have until it’s gone. The first week after finding out about her passing was the hardest. Starting final year at university with all these deadlines didn’t help either, and by the end of the week I had hit rock bottom. I have never been so low, even with my friends up north comforting me and lecturers being understanding and supportive.
It was a truly dark day, but the next day was a lot brighter. After hitting rock bottom the only way to go is up. Talking with friends back home helped a lot, and I came to the realisation that my friend is in a happier place now and it was time to move on and keep living. I will never forget her, because the impact she made on my youth was significant and I have so much love for her. She was caring, helpful, funny, random and one of the most intelligent people I know. I’ll miss her, more than what I can put into words.
There are so many happy memories that will never be forgotten. But now it’s time to make more happy memories with new challenges and adventures to grasp in life. Thinking positively and seeing the good in everything isn’t always bad thing. It’s how I cope, because happiness is the key to me. In the end we can all find happiness.
x In Memory of Katrina x
x Rest In Peace x